Want to keep your job in the age of AI? Stop scrolling and build your HQ

Never mind your IQ and your EQ, in the world of AI you’re going to need a high HQ. That stands for Human Quota and it means empathy, deep understanding, subtlety, lived experience – all the things technology can't offer. These traits are becoming rare and invaluable in workplaces (and life) but, in a cruel irony, they're the qualities our technology use is eroding. So how do we cultivate our HQ? Jess Stuart has tips.

We are living through one of the most profound shifts in human history. Artificial intelligence is evolving at breathtaking speed. Our devices are smarter, faster, more predictive. And yet, many of us feel more distracted, more polarised, less connected and more mentally exhausted than ever before.

Somewhere in the race to adopt smarter technology, I worry that we are quietly eroding the very skills that make us human. Skills that, ironically, will be as valuable as gold in an AI inundated future.

It feels as if things have gone from unity to division post pandemic, we’re ceasing to see those different to us as humans. We’re losing the art of debate, so fixed in our own views we’ve lost the art of seeing things from another's perspective. This is exacerbated by algorithms that curate virtual microcosms that reinforce our own thoughts, regardless of the truth.

I don’t know about you but I’m not sure what’s real anymore when I go online. I also know my feed and the social media "news" I consume is vastly different that being read by the guy down the road – we live in different online worlds, even though we're neighbours.

AI is exactly as it says on the tin – artificial. It’s amazing and clever but it will never be real. And we need ‘real’ as humans. Just look at the social media revolution: yes, we might be more connected than ever before and have more “friends” than we ever had in real life, and yet we’re also the loneliest we’ve ever been. Nearly one in four people worldwide (that is, more than a billion people) are leading lonely lives, according to a Meta-Gallup survey of more than 140 countries.

Technology can “connect” us but it cannot bring us closer to one another.

AI can generate words, images, strategies and answers. It can mimic tone and simulate conversation, but it cannot feel. It doesn’t know the weight of a difficult decision, the ache of burnout or the joy of being fully seen.

Human connection, real presence, deep listening, authentic care cannot be automated. And in an increasingly artificial world, authenticity becomes magnetic. People will seek what is real, this means brands built on genuine humanity will stand out. Leaders who can truly connect will be trusted and relationships rooted in presence will feel like rare treasures.

While our uniquely human traits might (or at least should) be increasing in value, technology is also subtly changing what it means to be human, and not necessarily in a good way. We’re living through a focus crisis and this has massive impacts in the workplace.

Attentions spans are becoming shorter. US psychologist and academic Dr Gloria Mark’s research indicates that average human attention spans have plummeted from 2.5 minutes in 2004 to just 47 seconds today.

A client of mine who works as the head of HR at an Auckland-based professional services firm, noticed that while employees claimed to have completed training modules, the key information contained in them didn’t appear to have stuck.

So she changed her approach. Content was condensed into one-page summaries, then translated into short audio and video snippets. Inspired by social media consumption habits, she devised an approach she called “Tik Tok training” and told me it did improve engagement, especially in younger team members.

We live in a culture designed to fracture attention. There’s constant urgency, infinite content consumption, endless notifications (which I’ve turned off, there’s so many!).

Our brains adapt accordingly, with shorter attention spans, shallower thinking, the ability to cope with more mental noise.

But quiet focus is where insight and creativity live.

The ability to sit with complexity rather than escape it is what allows meaningful work, deep learning and genuine self-awareness. It’s the wisdom of being human and fundamental to our survival and yet it’s in decline.

Then of course there’s the emotional intelligence that’s required to thrive as a human. The way we navigate conflict, our resilience, our motivation, how we relate to others. The ability to read a room, sense nuance, listen deeply, and empathise – we build these skills by real human interaction.

But digital life increasingly rewards speed and reaction over depth and reflection. Algorithms amplify extremes, feeding polarisation and certainty instead of curiosity and respect. From behind a keyboard it’s too easy to forget there’s often a human at the other end of our comments.

Emotional intelligence (EQ) is becoming a lost art and as a result we’re losing what makes us human. When we engage more with screens than with each other, we lose the subtle art of human relating.

As a species, we didn’t survive and evolve because we had big fangs or strong bodies, we relied on our ability to connect, to form tribes, to work together, to collaborate and to relate. We might be at risk of losing that. So what’s the answer?

It’s something I call Human Quota (HQ), it’s the art of being human. We have IQ for intelligence and EQ for emotional quota (which I’d argue is also present in HQ) but it’s bigger than that and becomes our point of difference in a world of AI and tech.

We know from our own experience, particularly in times of crisis, it’s those who have this HQ who thrive and can help others through as well.

HQ helps us protect our ability to listen without distraction, to exercise for empathy over judgement, to think deeply rather than scroll endlessly, to have real conversations and reflect rather than react.

Developing HQ doesn’t mean you have to move to the mountains and shun the wonders of technology. It’s about becoming conscious users of technology, making the most of all it has to offer while deeply valuing and protecting our more subtle and evolved human traits.

1. Start by reclaiming small moments of undivided attention. Put your phone face down in meetings. Walk without earbuds. Eat without scrolling. These tiny acts rebuild your capacity to be fully present.

2. Schedule thinking time the same way you schedule meetings. Deep thinking doesn’t happen accidentally in a distracted world, it requires protected space.

3. Practise listening to understand, not to respond. Notice when judgement rises and choose curiosity instead. Emotional intelligence grows through repeated, real-world interactions, not online commentary.

4. Next time someone speaks, ask yourself “What might they be feeling right now?” This simple shift trains empathy and improves connection.

5. Create boundaries with devices. Turn off non-essential notifications. Have device free times or places in your home. Your brain will recalibrate faster than you expect.

6. And finally, prioritise real connection. Have conversations that aren’t optimised or performative. Ask better questions. Stay a little longer in the discomfort of honesty. This is where trust, belonging and meaning are built.

More on this topic

The rise of friend making events combating the loneliness epidemic

Several in-person friend making initiatives have launched in New Zealand this year, largely attracting the age group experiencing the most loneliness.

Life

October 28, 2025

2:20

The future belongs to those who can integrate technology without losing humanity. To those who can leverage AI while still leading with heart.

With a background in HR, Jess Stuart is now a Waiheke-based career coach and the author of several books including: Burnout to Brilliance and I Love Mondays.