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Crawling to the end of another year and questioning your work/life balance?

With almost one milllion Kiwis working 40 hours per week and over 280,000 of us working more than 50 hours, you're not alone if you're worn out. But maybe it's time to ditch the quest for that elusive balance and aim instead for work/life integration? After all, writes Jess Stuart, it's all life.

At this time of year many of us can feel like we’re limping to the finish line. It tends to happen most years which always leaves me thinking: is work life balance actually a thing?

Moving to Aotearoa from the northern hemisphere 15 years ago I was immediately struck by the different approach. Over there, with summer holidays happening in July/August, they get two breaks, spaced evenly across the year. But in the southern hemisphere, many of us take most of our leave at Christmas and then try and last the whole year until the next break. It might be a less sustainable approach – an extra reason to strive for balance between work and life.

Stats show Kiwis clocking up the hours

Many workers spend upwards of 40 hours per week on the job, and a large number go as far as to regularly log in after hours and on weekends to get the job done. 2023 NZ Census data shows almost a million of us said we worked 40 hours a week, 186,450 said they worked 50 and 69,192 said they worked 60 hours a week. Almost 20,000 said they worked 70 hours a week and 9201 said they worked 80 hours.

Many of us don't think we're being productive if we're not stressed.

For so long, we’ve talked about this quest for work/life balance, and yet it seems elusive for many. I even went to the great lengths of becoming my own boss to escape the nine-to-five, only to then work even more hours setting up my own business! It’s led me to the conclusion there is no work/life balance. It’s all life. And within that life, most of us need to find a way to integrate some work.

Is balance a myth?

The term balance implies that work and life are two separate forces constantly in opposition, competing for time and energy. It suggests if one goes up, the other must go down. But in reality, they’re deeply interconnected and don’t always split neatly.

With hybrid work, flexible hours, and technology blurring the lines between work and personal life, many people blend the two throughout the day. Dan, for example, attends his daughter's assembly in the afternoon and logs on later. Integration acknowledges this fluidity.

Career coach and author Jess Stuart, photographed by Tabitha Arthur

Life doesn't stop for work

Hybrid working has brought with it increased flexibility, a chance to regain some balance perhaps? My friend Anna often goes in late when she has medical appointments or school drop-offs and leaves early if she’s logging on that night from home to finish off. Susan nips out for yoga over lunchtime at the community hall when she’s working from home and tells me she often puts a load of washing on or meets a friend for coffee. This is balance, and it happens around our work. It also ensures our work is of better quality and we’re more productive when we’re constantly recharging as we go.

It took me a while to learn this and to not feel guilty about it! I used to work long hours: if I wasn’t in meetings, I was in the car, commuting through the Auckland traffic. I’d grab fast food because it was quick and I could eat on the run. After getting in late, I was so exhausted exercise was the last thing I felt like doing, so I’d crash on the sofa and then get my laptop out to catch up on emails. I spent my weekends sleeping in and catching up on all the housework I’d let slide during the week. I knew it wasn’t healthy but wasn’t sure how to change it.

Eventually, I hit a wall and burned out. This ultimately led to a fork in the road where everything changed, including my career. Reflecting on this experience helped me ensure I’m earning a living but also making a life at the same time.

I have integrated work as part of my life these days and while I can be found doing emails at 6pm some days it’s likely because I’ve been surfing or at the beach all afternoon. I get it’s easier to have this flexibility when you’re your own boss. I feel I get to live a life and earn a living though with this work approach. It brings me more freedom and working this way gives me more energy for the things I do both inside and outside of work.

Five strategies to achieve work/life integration

1. Set boundaries

Integrating work into your life, doesn't mean allowing it to creep into every minute of every day, quite the opposite. Set clear start and finish times for your workday. Don’t just log off, mentally switch off. Communicate these boundaries with your team, clients, and family so they’re respected.

2. Schedule life like you schedule work

Put your personal time (exercise, hobbies, family dinners) in your calendar like you would a meeting. This ensures you protect that time rather than fitting it in around work.

3. Take micro-moments of rest

You don’t always need a week off to feel rested. Short breaks during the day (walks, breathing exercises, screen-free lunch) can recharge your brain and keep stress levels in check.

4. Redefine productivity

Busy doesn’t mean effective and true productivity is sustainable. Focus on impact and value not hours worked. Remember rest and recovery are part of high performance, not a reward for it.

5. Make space – for fun, relaxation, creativity and thinking

In our busy schedules space is often hard to come by, but our overloaded brains also need space to focus and decompress. Having space in our schedule and our brains has so many benefits to our health as well as our innovation and performance.

With a background in HR, Jess Stuart is now a Waiheke-based career coach and the author of several books including: Burnout to Brilliance and I Love Mondays.

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